Last weekend i was in Glasgow which is like a second home in a way, as i have family living there. On arrival your mouth waters with the decision “Indian, Japanese, Mexican or maybe Thai or Chinese” This is a treat for most Hebrideans, as unless you can cook your own the only other choice is buy a horrible tv dinner from the local supermarket, Yugh! But i love cooking. Its a funny thing “Haggis neeps and tatties” although the Scottish national dish, are rarely eaten except On Robert Burns night, but afterwards you always think “ why don't we eat this more often” Maybe if i lived in Glasgow again the novelty of these restaurants might ware off a bit.
Trips away usually take in guitar stores, computer retailers, and useless gadgets that you simply cant live without at the time, until you get home and fire them into a drawer and probably never use again. I think i have a magpie gene in me, if its small shiny and has flashing lights, i buy. Strange thing i swear i can hear people rub their hands together when i enter a gadget shop, hmmm. Once you have bought your guitar tuners, strings, pics, and other useless junk, you then try and navigate your way through the main street past the Hari Krishna's, market researchers, big issue sellers, and credit card reps, wheew! But too name a few. If you were weak willed, one could be shouting “Goranga” filling out a market research form in between reading the Big issue, and wondering what to buy with your new credit card. The secret is no eye contact, if you look at them once, thats you. I have also tried the “I don't speak English” routine which just makes them try even harder, and they then scratch their head and wonder at how you are very fluent in swearing under your breath. Maybe what i should do the next time im in a city, is carry an A4 binder with a pen and look like im doing a survey, i bet i wont see them for dust.
After that, you drive back to the flat to find all the parking spaces have been nicked by the local students, so you park the car in an Evil Kenevil fashion, then climb out the sunroof and unload the days shopping. Heading home to Islay is a relief, but remember the traffic diversions, speed cameras, caravans and road works etc.
Back home the closest thing to a traffic jam is two locals parked side by side on a single track road catching up on the day to day, which i do myself. Total bliss, no round abouts, traffic lights, speed cameras, i tune into the radio just to listen to the travel reports for a laugh. The strange thing is after some weeks i miss the city and then look forward to my next trip, i know, strange or what?
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